weighing down my soul

Tue, 05 Jul 2005 02:18:22 GMT

danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e danni___e

incase you havent already caught on, danni___e

Mon, 30 May 2005 14:08:10 GMT

my three day weekend so far:
friday--> i came home and had to clean my room but that didn't last very long because i hate to clean my room. then everyone went to jamaican me hungry and i went to subway. i wish i had gone to jamaican me hungry....so at 630 my family all came over for my brothers birthday. he's 17 now! i just like the fact that he can drive me placceeesssss. there was a thunderstorm we all sat out on my deck and watched it. well not we all but some of us.
saturday-->uh i went to k*rose's around 12. we ate a hamburger and we watched tv and i dont really remember what else we did. then we came to my house at 3:30 where we had lobster for dinner. we also played with bouncy balls and game cube and chalk. and krista skateboarded then rob and katie and pat were walking by and stopped for a little while before we had to go in to eat dinner (this summary is way out of order). oh and we made perlers. except for ben ruined hers when she was just almost done. i ate pie and krista ate oreos.
sunday--> woke up got, in the shower, scooped up k*rose, and went to church :) then she came back here to help lay out patpatpatio but i suck at that so we didn't do much. then her parents scooped us up to go to her family cookout. we ate food and watched tv and drew with chalk and skateboarded and held baby alex who is the cutest little boy on the earth. :) then we went back to kristas, watched some tv, went for a walllllllkk, came back home, watched some tv, went to visit annie, came back home, ran in the pouring rain! and then i went home and donny and ben were still here so we did some fireworks and i ate another cheeseburger and some oreos and went to sleep.
now its monday and i'm afraid i've missed the parade.
OFF TO MADAGASCAR TODAY?
i hope that everyone on the toronto trip had a nice time!!!!
and i wish a happy birthday to my fishing bait. !!!!!!!!!!!!

ps. im still looking for someone who might want to fix my layout for me? its crappy.

Sun, 22 May 2005 02:43:38 GMT

You are Tater Tots. Go get your own!!

Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Tue, 10 May 2005 22:14:35 GMT

someone please help with my layout
i screwed it up major.

Sat, 30 Apr 2005 19:51:13 GMT

sorry about the layout, im redoing it and it will be screwed up while i'm in the process.

ILL NEVER BE YOUR BEAST OF BURDEN

Wed, 20 Apr 2005 01:55:23 GMT

remind me never to cut my own hair.

eh. moving on....

murder myster pictures!

^mr.demelo losing his moustache and forgetting his lines. so funny.

so katie and I got bored during 'dessert' and took some pictures

and then....we saw that they left an envelope on the floor!!!

and it gave us an idea...

maybe its a clue! so we went into stealth mode and retreived the envelope.

Sadly it was just a cheat sheet for lines. So then we got worried about getting in trouble for taking it and we put it back. But some girl thought we were tampering with props so she picked it up!

we thought "OH NO! THEY WONT HAVE IT TO READ THEIR LINES! WE RUINED THE PLAY!"

but rest easy :0)

they had their envelope. cheaters.

so the play ended and voting began.

we were ready with our clue sheets and money.

i was ESPECIALLY ready with my money :0)

the ending was stupid. they picked the most obvious character. it definitly should have been mr. white.

and this is all of the cast, though the pictures didnt come out that great. the funniest part of the second one is the woman sitting down in the black coat and pink and white shirt. i think SHE was the murderer.

so after the solution was revealed they did the raffles. this was hilarious. dominick won the frickin spa with one ticket, when i put ALL of my tickets in there. errr! lol and then when alex won his basket of chocolate "YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" hahaha but i did win 2 movie tickets so it was straight.

then we get out into the parking lot and my brother had stolen our car so we had to sit there and wait for him to come back. so....more pictures!

eh, dont even ask what my face was doing. bad pictures, i know. and thats why i wont even put in the rest. theyre even worse.

EL FIN!

and i leave you with a picture of our new POPE!

mmm... i hear he is a former member of hitlers army?

are we dealing with a nazi or a pope here?

Thu, 07 Apr 2005 01:02:02 GMT

so mrs. eggleston decides to be gay and tell NHS that my behavior problem hasn't improved. If that didn't piss me off so much, I would probably laugh. She put on my report card "A pleasure to have in class" and "A posivite role model for others" Sounds like someone with a real behavior problem to me.

and mrs. burns is giving me a c-. Tell me how a teacher who has only been here for 3 weeks can give me a c- in a class that I usually get a's in. Not saying I think I deserved the A, because I slacked off with Mr. Hewey being gone. But C-? She was like "do you think you deserve to pass?" I was like uhh YEAH. When I have a pile of beads that I made, two necklaces, part of a bookmark....and when I'm not even supposed to have ANY work to show her considering 3rd time is research.

and I dont care if I'm being stupid and complaining too much. teachers are stupid. they should all go somewhere. somewhere hot.

someday I will find the secret to your social chemistry

Sun, 20 Mar 2005 21:52:53 GMT

so I went snowboarding yesterday.
boy was that a trip. sam, ben, and myself along with my dad and bens dad...
I saw Vance there and I think I watched him go up the lift 3 times while I was still sitting on the top of the hill afraid to go down.
I got better though and we went down a couple of different trails. Or whatever you call them?
Rob is going to take me snowboarding with him next year and I am excited!
And I might go back next weekend with my family again.I'll try to balance out the ratio of time falling on my butt to time actually snowboarding..even if just a little bit.

I'm pretty confused right now about alot of stuff. I don't know how to handle everything but I know I won't let myself get depressed. I cried for so long last night but I can't do that. I will have to find some other way to deal with this. To make things better and STAY better for once.

one more random thing, I was listening to a bunch of my old mix cds today. From yearrss ago. I was such a weird kid..one CD went from Pink Floyd to the B-52s with some christina agulera, LFO, 98 degrees, and barenaked ladies. It ended nicely with <3 goo goo dolls <3.

Tue, 15 Mar 2005 20:06:21 GMT

-my grandma has a blockage in her artery but its nothing serious that needs to be operated on right away.
+++++++++++++!!!!

complaints...

Tue, 15 Mar 2005 00:06:51 GMT

+ I lost one friend but it feels like I have none. To be taken in the most literal way possible, I have not ONE friend that I talk to on a daily basis and/or hang out with on a regular basis. I have nobody to tell just every stupid little thing about my day to anymore, who I think would actually care and listen.

+ My grandma was having surgery on her hand and as a precaution to her age, had her heart checked to make sure it was fine. And ain't it lovely, we find out she has the same problems that my dead Noni had. My mom is going to the hospital with her tomorrow for more tests.

+ My relationship with my mom is pretty much gone. We seriously dont get along at all. I know its pretty normal, but it never was for us. We usually NEVER faught, and now we really dislike each other a large part of the time.

+ Mr. Hewey has been out for a few weeks now and Megan just told me that he has a tumor in his chest and is having surgery. Hes not a real young guy by any means, so I'm pretty nervous.

+ I'm doing pretty crappy in school and that sucks when you're used to getting A's. I can't get myself to sit down and do my homework anymore, and I can't even remember the last time I studied for anything.

Complaining may not make things better, but it gives you something to do in the mean time right?

mmm..

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 01:37:26 GMT

I don't really know if this is true or not..kind of I think. But:.....

Your Brain is 60.00% Female, 40.00% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female

You are both sensitive and savvy

Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed

But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

What Gender Is Your Brain?

I'm in a really shitty mood per usual. &My dad has been gone on vacation and he just got home today- he asked me to go to the store with him but I said no. I think that I am a bad daughter..I told him I'm sorry and he said not to worry about it. I missed my daddy.. I really do love him.
I think that I also must be a bad friend or something. I'm such a jealous person and it puts me through much more aggrivation then I really need to go through. Or maybe I deserve to go through that, who knows? All I know is I'm sick of feeling so shitty and even more so of complaining about it. I can't help it though, I'm such a whiner and I like feeling bad for myself.
Whatever, I'm just a shitty person okay? This way I can't let anyone else down- know ahead of time that I am a bad person. I have to go do something I have too much nervous energy. Or something like that...bye.

vaca babay

Sat, 26 Feb 2005 05:29:01 GMT

so my vacation has been pretty good. i'm really mad that it's over though.
i got to chill with kayda alot :0) <3
i have a funny story about tonight with snewber and snewlu...
well first we decided to go to ron-a-roll..so we get there and there are pure thugs and gangsters and in walks white me and krista, and katie (who at least is puerto rican lol) with kristas mom.
we felt out of place but were like alright whatever we'll just stay for a little bit...
so we're chillin in the lobby waiting for 8 o clock to get in when some big dude comes out and says
"BOYS ON THIS SIDE, GIRLS ON THIS SIDE!"
i thought it was a game..you know how ron-a-roll does that sometimes? well we just back off and all of a sudden they are like "NOW EMPTY YOUR POCKETS AND SPIT OUT YOUR GUM" and they start like patting everyone down! and i mean hold your arms, spread your legs, i'm patting you down type of thing. so we were like yeaaahh lets go
haha so we go to the bowling alley and there are pure OLD people! and every single lane is taken! t urns out friday nights are 'league nights'
well we decided to rent a movie and go back to kristas to watch it. we rented garden state but ended up talking through the whole thing instead of actually watching it.

TOMORROW
i get to spend alllllllllllllll day with my baby girl kayda <33333 i love her i love her i love her. thats riiight DONT EVER FUCKING QUESTION THAT
and then if everything goes as planned making a video with snewlu and snewber at night :0)

Tue, 22 Feb 2005 03:40:53 GMT

i don't think i know who i am...
i'd really like to find out.

Sun, 20 Feb 2005 15:58:10 GMT

honestly, wtf is my problem.

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 01:42:45 GMT

okay, i have to admit that the pissed of face looks funny, and it did make me laugh.

BUT :LFDjsdlf!! errr! im so pissed off right now about everything.
I'm sick of the way people are. I'm trying so hard right now to 'love the sinner and hate the sin' but it really is so hard. People are so ignorant and ahh I dont even have a word.
Don't get me wrong, by no means am I saying that I'm not guilty of alot of the things I'm getting so pissed off about, but honestly.
Its not all that I'm mad about, but this National Honors Society shit is driving me crazy.
Don't invite me in this and then after I take all the time to fill out the frikken papers make me go through more shit of having to explain myself and my gay ass english class.
And to my english teacher, don't take me out in the hallway asking for my advice because you "wanted to go to someone you could rely on" and tell me how disrespectful the class is but not me because i've "had a solid day every day this year" AND THEN TURN AROUND AND PUT YOUR FINGER IN MY FACE telling me that me and krista are a big part of the problem in our class.
And secondly, I'm sick of people causing problems for the sake of causing problems and talking shit about other people for the sake of..well, again, causing problems.
i just want to explode right now.
also because i really don't know why all of this is bothering me so much.

and now I'm mad about being mad. I'm supposed to be changed and witnessing and loving.
i'm just so stressed out.

oh but by the way my MRI was today. i was wicked nervous because i had to be in the white tunnel thing for like 20 minutes with lights and noises all around me. But I was really comfortable with a pillow and knee rest and ear plugs lol. The worst part was actually moving into the tunnel but once it stopped I was fine because everything was stationary ya know? And then the buzzers went off in like groups like the first was 2 minutes and then 5 minutes or whatever. But I occupied myself by listening to the buzzers and like hearing voices in them lol saying DOY DOY DOY! or DOODIE DOODIE DOODIE! one time it sounded like a swarm of bees was after me.

AND, i swear this is the last thing. krista and i totally killed my mom today. she tried saying no but with two of us nagging her she didn't stand a chance :0) THEREFORE we got to chill tonight andddd we get to tomorrow as well. :0) and noelles birthdayy tomorrow, im excited for, and a happy birthday on sunday to her and megan.

you placed the stars in the sky and you know them by name

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 02:23:14 GMT

so YEC this weekend was awesome. I don't even know what to say about it.. so much. jAMES t was back. What an amazinngg preacher. I had pictures and all that in here but livejournal decided to give me a hard time and I dont feel like doing all that again.

Friday is my MRI. It was supposed to be like sometime last week but the doctors office decided to not call and tell me, therefore I missed my appoitment and had to have another one scheduled. Im really nervous about it, but i think itll be really cool to see the MRI pictures afterwards...like all of your muscles and stuff show up and its neat.

thats ABOUT it, except for that i love you :0)

get backkkk get backkkk

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 21:01:47 GMT

Jojo left his home in tucson, arizona
For some california grass.

errmm EFF YOU, me.

Thu, 20 Jan 2005 01:28:38 GMT

i've decided that i am really insecure...
and most of the time have a very low self esteem.
i'm also a really awful person.
i take any problem that i have,
and i make it so much worse.

i end up hurting people who i'd NEVER want to hurt...
and then find some shitty way to twist it around
and make it seem like it wasnt my fault.
i get jealous of everyone and everything.
i hate me, i do. and i'm sorry.

wednesday

Wed, 19 Jan 2005 21:47:54 GMT

let's recap:
espanol con senora belt- 85 on my midterm, not too bad considering the 42% i got on the reading part.
orchestra- nothing new to say. we got pirates of the caribean music.
history- no midterm grades, 88 for quarter 2, and some shit about marie antoinette's husband needing surgery on his penis
algebra 2- SIONARA MCCORMICK. and did you know that there are numbers other than real numbers? yeah, imaginary numbers. PURE imaginary numbers. oh yeah, and a 51 on my midterm. haha

uhh chamber tonight.
appt. w/ rubano tomorrow morning= missing bio.
i want him to tell me that my back got worse
i love physical therapy.

YEC=9 days. so psyched
but i'm gonna miss saturday.
:8( <-- thats a sad pig.

midterms finally over

Fri, 14 Jan 2005 18:07:42 GMT

do you remember how to find the area of a triangle?
nope :)
do you want to shoot yourself in the head right now?
yep :)
noelle. my test taking and failing buddy.

Fri, 14 Jan 2005 02:01:02 GMT

school should really just die.
im so sick of it.
and im so ready to fail two midterms tomorrow :0)

age of reason and the enlightenment

Thu, 13 Jan 2005 22:49:03 GMT

world history and algebra 2 tomorrow.
i basically have to teach myself algebra.
i should have payed attention on review day...
instead of writing notes with noelle,
to the westsiders.

anyhoo i have to write a notecard
to help me with my essay on the age of reason.
what is the age or reason? ahh.
screwed much? si si.

SHOONDORI!

baby's got blue skies up ahead

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 16:30:02 GMT

so things seem to be looking up.
maybe we aren't completely lost.
today was nice,just being able to talk.
[i love you, you know.]

spanish exam wasnt so bad...
i guessed alot on the reading, but eh
now im going to get some lunch and go shovel.

oh, and yeah. so melanie on real world has scabies.
they should calm down because i had that over the summer,
and slept in the same bed with krista for a week.
yeah, she definitly was scabies free.
also: you don't feel anything crawling around on you,
its just like having poison ivy.
so, real world cast members, chill. :0)

cya

apparently i just suck at life...

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 02:38:48 GMT

I do a nice job burning my kitchen table with hot glass:

twice.

and a nice job of burning my desk and, as my mom says, 'almost burning down the house'

and i have no picture to accompany this one with, but my mother believes ungodly things of me. Granted, I may have given her small reason to believe I have, but I've done nothing wrong. And isn't she supposed to trust me?

Also, its cool to lose a best friend. thats my favorite, you know. 'forever''s and 'no matter what''s always seem to fall through huh?

on a better note, natalie made just the neatest necklace for me, and i do thank her for that. i love it

I feel stupid. every mood i've had in this journal has been some form of 'bad'.

Thats why I've decided to leave this one blank.

& I hope everyone had a nice first day of midterms.

...mine wasnt so shabby.

yo busco una falda

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 00:05:44 GMT

why would i be interested in speaking a second language.
this is stupid. they shouldn't make us do this.